*The title of this post was taken from the Elvis Costello & The Attractions song of the same name*
In the podcast Someone Has To Say It that I co-host with my good friend, Blake Babcock, we were recently discussing how open I can be when discussing my life (specifically my past and anything pre- RevFit days.) The condensed version is that much of what happened from about 20-30 years of age was patchy and chaotic. Not all of it was bad but there were a lot of behaviors I had to deal with that affected virtually everyone who crossed my path. It wouldn’t be until shortly after my son was born that I began to look at my life through a vastly different lens. (This is my happy boy just a few weeks ago.)
Unfortunately, there is a risk attached when I speak openly about these things. I’m generally pretty blunt when people ask me all that occurred and to be honest, much of it doesn’t paint me in a very good light. The candor can turn some people off. I’m not naive to the fact that it can happen. My hope has always been that if people who are trying to change their own lives can see how I had to change my own, maybe that will get them one step closer to success as they define it for themselves.
While the birth of my son was a pivotal point for me, I have to also include the changes I went through when his mother and I split, the clean slate I worked to make when I met my current wife, and of course, the passing of my father.
As I mentioned a few weeks ago in my post about self esteem, we all are fighting some type of battle. There are clients who walk through my door that have suffered abuse, neglect, rape, battery and everything in between. You wouldn’t know it if you met them. But by opening up myself to the world, some of my clients have decided to open up to me as well.
Without rehashing too much of what was said in the aforementioned post, I think it’s important to not identify too closely with your past. Obviously, if you have a past that you’re proud of then I think you should wear it shamelessly. I am not one of those people. A great portion of my past is downright deplorable. However, I spend a little bit of time every day making small steps to distance myself from it. My son deserves the best father that he can have. My mother, the best son. My wife, the best husband.
True to the title of this post, every day you have a choice of which story you want others to tell about you. How you act, react, respond and live will write the words. There’s a lot you can accomplish when you take care of your health. It’s one of the few selfish acts in this world that is equally selfless when you are offering the best version of you back to those who care about you.
So lift a weight, run a mile, drop some pounds, eat quality food in appropriate amounts, love your significant other with reckless abandon, kiss your children, compliment someone in their outfit, be nicer, laugh a little, hug your dog, sleep well, listen more intently, speak a bit less…write the book.
Maybe your story resonates somewhat with mine. Maybe the person you used to be is keeping you from being the person you want to be. Identify the weakness…write the book.
Every day I thank anyone who will listen that I get the opportunity to help people who want something better than the “right here, right now.” I think that’s awesome. They’ve identified the weakness. Their chapters are being written (and sometimes rewritten.)
If you’re already a part of the group considered the RevFit family, you’re making your strides. Every day you have another opportunity to change the course and head in the right direction. Every day you turn a page and keep writing for a desired outcome.
I did…you can too.