Many years ago, I saw a couple that I knew go through a particularly rough period.
At the time, my understanding of their circumstances was from the perspective of only one of those two people.
As a result, my opinion on the circumstances, how each person handled it and the way it affected them afterwards was somewhat incomplete and, to be honest, a bit harsh and unfair.
Recently, I gained some insight on the same situation from the other person’s point of view, and it reframed the entire chain of events in a completely different light.
I realized, with the benefit of hindsight, that I was not well informed to live so long with that one-sided opinion.
When the time is right, I’ll need to apologize to the appropriate parties for how I handled that event.
I understand that what I wrote is intentionally vague and I did that to protect the innocent.
But in thinking about it, it’s a broader problem which I think we all struggle with in some capacity.
You’ve likely heard many times before that you never know what kind of battle someone is fighting, and to be kind to everyone since that lack of knowledge could be detrimental.
I’m privileged to run a business which caters to upwards of a hundred people that I interact and engage with on a daily/weekly basis. That’s a hundred different personalities, dynamics, backstories and challenges that all have to be navigated differently so that each person feels heard, accepted, welcomed and respected.
I don’t always get it right.
I try to not only hear different sides of stories but to put myself in the shoes of others, to remind myself about my own challenges and misgivings, and to ask as many questions as I can to understand what it’s like to see the world through someone else’s eyes.
It helps when you hear people talk about politics.
It helps when you hear people talk about religion.
It helps when you hear people talk about their sexual/social preferences and lifestyles.
It helps when you hear people talk about their culture and upbringing.
It helps when you hear people talk about their trauma.
There’s a lot I’m still trying to learn. Not just about myself but the people around me.
The funny thing is, I had another post roughly 80% done that I was going to post today but this thought just kept bothering me.
So, at a time when it seems like people are digging in their heels and demanding to be heard: ask thoughtful questions and learn what you can about why people see the world the way they do.
I might be crazy for thinking it but respect and compassion come a lot easier when you try to view the world from more than just your perspective.
I recently completed a course covering Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) and the low FODMAP approach to working with IBS through Monash University.
The course, designed for dietitians, was a wealth of information. Having recently acquired my Level 5 diploma in advanced nutrition through Mac-Nutrition University, I was granted access to the Monash course.
One point of distinction is that, since I am not (nor do I aim to be) a registered dietitian, I cannot claim to be “certified” in the course, only that I passed and completed it.
Since IBS is something that comes up with a fair amount of frequency in my conversations with clients, I wanted to break down the course in as close to layman’s terms as I could for my readers and, hopefully, as a reference for those who suffer with IBS and may be looking for treatment options.
If you believe you need help with this approach, consider speaking with an RD or gastroenterologist for more in-depth care and guidance.
To offer a framework of functional bowel disorders, there are 3 potentially overlapping characteristics: abdominal pain, constipation and diarrhea. Within those characteristics, patients can present with symptoms of bloating and distension.
IBS currently affects somewhere between 3.8 and 9.2% of the worldwide population and there are three factors which may contribute to an increase in seeing the diagnosis: a leaning towards a more “western” diet, the increase of anxiety and depression (which affects how the brain and gut communicate) and more people seeking out treatment for their concerns.
IBS affects 1.5 times more women than men, it does appear more common in people with a lower socio-economic status and appears to be more prevalent in people under the age of 50.
I should mention that symptoms of IBS can improve and then get worse, new symptoms can develop over time and sometimes symptoms can be mild or more severe, all of which can have a direct effect on the quality of life of the patient since there can be periods of more urgency to go and this influencing the social life of each individual struggling with it.
It was noted in the coursework that IBS can affect the desire to travel and attend work events. It can also have a negative effect on sleep, diet and intimacy.
While it’s unclear what causes IBS, proposed mechanisms are: visceral hypersensitivity, changes in gut microbiota, changes in gut motility, anxiety/stress related symptoms, inflammation, immune system response, and intestinal permeability. There may also be a hereditary factor but this may have more to do with exposure and learned behaviors rather than a genetic link.
The most common symptoms of IBS are: bloating, abdominal distension, constipation, diarrhea, lower abdominal pain, excessive flatulence, and alternating bowel habits.
Practitioners who are diagnosing IBS will likely use some combination of the Rome criteria test to look at frequency of conditions and the Bristol stool chart to assess the consistency of bowel movements.
There are a series of red flags which may also contribute to diagnosis or point to something else happening with the body: unexplained weight loss, age of onset greater than 50 years, family history of bowel disease, rectal bleeding/anemia, nocturnal bowel motions, persistent daily diarrhea, recurrent vomiting, fever and progressive/severe symptoms.
Where circumstances can be further complicated is when IBS presents with symptoms similar to other conditions such as: inflammatory bowel disease, celiac disease, intestinal cancers, pelvic floor disorders, bile salt malabsorption, endocrine disorders, pancreatic exocrine insufficiency, endometriosis and diverticular disease. Generally, a family physician or gastroenterologist can administer a series of tests to rule out something more serious or to come closer to a diagnosis of IBS.
As of this writing, the diagnoses of candidiasis and non-celiac gluten/wheat sensitivity are controversial and not backed by high quality evidence. Also, fecal microbiota testing, fecal short-chain fatty acid testing, IgG food intolerance testing, salivary IgA, and intestinal permeability testing is not recommended in routine clinical practice.
Some practitioners may advise breath testing to diagnose conditions but currently the only breath test which appears to have clinical significance is the lactose breath test.
At this time, the therapies available to help with IBS include: certain medications such as anti-diarrheals, laxatives and antidepressants, dietary interventions (more on low FODMAP below), exercise, certain probiotics, psychotherapy (CBT and gut-directed hypnotherapy) and biofeedback therapy.
Anecdotally, some people associate an increase of IBS symptoms with fatty foods (fried foods, pizza, cream, etc.) In addition, certain proteins may also be problematic including β-casein (found in milk), rubisco (found in spinach), wheat-germ lectin, α-amylase/trypsin inhibitors (ATIs), and gluten. While some people may simply try to remove gluten from the diet, it’s unclear whether gluten is totally at fault or if the ATIs or fructans are the issue.
As for carbohydrates, the ones which appear to be implicated in an increase of IBS symptoms include: fiber, prebiotics, and short-chain carbohydrates (lactose, sorbitol, mannitol, fructose and oligosaccharides). Monash University pioneered the low FODMAP approach for IBS symptoms. FODMAP is the acronym for: Fermentable Oligo- Di- Mono-saccharides And Polyols.
For those who want a deeper dive into this approach, Monash has created an app which allows you to see and tailor which foods and servings of foods are most problematic for each individual and helps you tailor a plan specific to your needs. Search for “Monash University FODMAP diet” on your smart device to download.
In Phase 1 of the approach, it’s suggested that you trial for 2-6 weeks and swap “high” and “moderate” FODMAP foods for “low” foods. In Phase 2 (6-8 weeks) you’ll have a reintroduction period to determine what the body can tolerate. In Phase 3, you should have enough data to personalize a plan for yourself.
While this is not a comprehensive list and more options can be found within the app, I’ve given examples of foods which could be excluded in efforts to improve IBS symptoms:
Fructans: grapefruit, dates, onion, garlic, wheat/rye based bread, and falafels
GOS: green peas, black beans, navy beans, kidney beans, cashews, and pistachios
Sorbitol: apple, pear, avocado, apricot, blackberries, and plums
Mannitol: mushrooms, cauliflower, celery, and sweet potatoes
Fructose (in excess of glucose): mango, boysenberry, grapes, watermelon, asparagus, honey and fruit juice
Lactose: cow’s milk, yogurt, and custard
It should be noted again that just because you are temporarily removing a food to test against your symptoms, it does not mean that you can never have the food again. Rather, you may find that in the reintroduction phase, that you can tolerate smaller amounts of a given food and can learn your personal threshold for inclusion back into the diet.
As a reference, certain medications/supplements may present with GI symptoms and this may affect how your body reacts to a dietary intervention. Examples would be: antibiotics, codeine, iron, metformin and magnesium. If you’re currently taking any of these, work with your doctor to see if other options are available to minimize conflicting results.
In some cases, caffeine and alcohol may need to be eliminated to determine if the removal improves IBS symptoms. Since there is a correlation with stress and how stress can effect the digestive system, it should be recognized that exercise can be both a stress reliever and help with gut motility. Bear in mind that intense exercise can worsen symptoms so you may need to reduce intensity to gauge effectiveness of exercise in your regimen.
Also on the topic of stress, cognitive behavioral therapy, gut-directed hypnosis and having a meditation practice can all help improve feelings of stress and may have a correlation to improved IBS symptoms.
I’ll add in closing that due to the restrictive nature of the low FODMAP approach, working with an RD or gastroenterologist is recommended to make sure that you don’t develop micronutrient deficiencies along the way.
This course was of great interest to me due to changes we saw in my wife and her dietary needs over the last couple of years. There was a link to IBS and we frequently heard about the low FODMAP approach while she was seeking help. I’ll recommend again that you download the Monash app to see if it’s helpful for you and reiterate that the information in this post is not meant to replace the guidance of a doctor or dietitian.
Disclaimer: I receive no incentives for the app recommendation.
Last year, Marissa, Sebastian and I got off to Hocking Hills for a little getaway.
While we were at our cabin, we noticed a checkerboard and thought it might be good to teach Sebastian how to play.
I showed him how to move across the squares, how to jump, how to make a king and I showed him the moves a king could make.
Initially, I tried to show him how to read the board at least a pace or two ahead.
I’m no wiz at checkers and admittedly, I have no idea how to play chess, although I recall knowing how to play at some point in my youth.
If he made a move, I’d show him where there was an opportunity to lose a piece. If he was safe from a jump, I’d let him know but I’d also let him know if he was at risk.
He caught on pretty quickly.
Marissa, at one point, suggested that I give him some wins to build up his confidence, but our opinions differed on this.
Growing up, my father taught me how to play a lot of things: checkers, some card games, tennis, basketball, etc.
One thing he never “gave” me, was a win.
A win had to be earned.
At risk of making my Dad sound uncaring or insensitive, he was neither of those.
Dad never gloated if he won a game against me.
He never made me feel bad about not winning.
He gave me tools and tips to succeed on my own merit but the win had to come as my skills increased.
Mind you, I didn’t take all of those losses well. Sometimes, I’d feel sore about it but it taught me some valuable lessons that I’m trying to share with Sebastian.
And much like I did at about the same age, Sebastian can get sore if he feels like I’m winning a game against him.
I remind him to be patient.
I remind him to stay focused.
He plays better when he keeps his emotions in check.
I’ll admit, I’m not a particularly competitive person and perhaps my own take on playing a game wouldn’t be the best approach for an elite level talent and personality.
Also, I always try to tread carefully when I approach tips about parenting. I’m not a perfect parent and I don’t look down on people who do things differently with their own children.
But I do know that in life, the wins that tend to matter the most are the ones we earn.
You can say that about the job you get, the relationships that endure, the changes you want to see in your physique, and the way to improve yourself as a person.
-I have a client who’s not averse to counting calories and using a food tracking app. Her weight during our check-ins had plateaued and when I asked to see her food log over a week’s time, every day was “technically” in a deficit. In other words, she “should” have been seeing progress. I asked if there were any areas of her diet that she could think of that maybe weren’t being tracked as diligently. She mentioned that she didn’t track the cream she put in her coffee, the granola she sprinkled on her yogurt, and the assorted drinks she bought when she was working. When I asked her if she could just track those items for a few days and see what the calories came out to, she discovered why the scale wasn’t moving. Long story short: the little details matter.
-I do everything I can to make fat loss easier for people. Much of this comes down to time and convenience. Not everyone wants to make a home cooked meal, either because of the time it takes to do so or because they have to navigate too many different tastes/preferences in the house. As result, many of my tips come down to saying: YES, you should try a meal delivery service, YES, you should try high protein TV dinners, YES, you should buy pre-made meals from the grocery store and warm them up, YES, you should use your crockpot more. Remember that the less brainpower you have to spend on what you’re going to eat the more you can use brainpower for more important things in life.
-If your doctor and your therapist are both telling you to put fat loss on the backburner temporarily, that’s a really great sign that you’re putting too much value on the size of your body and not enough value on what it’s costing your mental health.
-A fantastic (but not foolproof) tool for fat loss is asking yourself: How will I feel 20-30 minutes after I eat this? Asked differently: How will I feel tomorrow if I eat this today?
-If my accountant asks me how much money I’ve spent on things I don’t need, I will probably underestimate the number but she can check my bank account and see how much I’ve spent down to the penny. Fat loss doesn’t work that way. If the scale isn’t moving, we don’t know exactly what you’ve consumed, how much you’ve consumed, how much you metabolized, and how much you expended. The only way to do that is to put you into a metabolic ward. Piggybacking off the first tip in this post, pay attention to those little details and look for margins of error. Oh yeah, and don’t ever, ever, ever, ever put your exercise calories burned into your food app. Those numbers are wrong.
-I heard two people talking about how much sugar was in a type of cereal that kids typically eat. They conveniently ignored (or forgot) about the fact that the juice they also serve the child had more than double the amount of sugar. I think this type of thing happens more often than we give it credit for. Sugar, frequently demonized, isn’t the monster people think it is. Can a lot of people benefit by reducing it? Sure. Do people need to be maniacal about every single gram of it? No.
-A lot of diet plans work well because they find a way to restrict a significant portion of foods. Some might tell you to remove all highly-processed foods, others might tell you to remove all white starchy carbs, and another still might suggest that you remove potentially inflammatory foods. A diet I was recently reminded of was so strict that it requested (among other foods) to remove carrots. Yes, carrots. A medium carrot has 25 calories. If you’re struggling with fat loss, your problem is not carrots. And whoever approved that meal plan to be sent out to the masses may need to sit in a warm corner of hell.
-How you speak about your body speaks volumes about how you feed and train your body. If you speak about your body with disdain and disrespect, there’s a great chance how you nourish and train your body aligns with those feelings. This sentiment is common regardless of the size and shape of the person. So, if you do anything today (and hopefully every day thereafter), speak about your body with kindness. It may not look or perform exactly the way you want it to, but what you’re capable of doing with it is a marvel in and of itself. Treat it that way.
The next intake of my 8-week online group coaching program, Fat Loss Simplified, begins the first week of July. The regular price is $189/month for two months. If you join between now and June 30, you’ll get in at $159/month for two months. If you’re interested in joining, drop me a message below.
Some day I won’t be in this world to share it with you (and I hope that day is far into the future).
When my father (your Opa) passed, he was far too young, and that left me with a lot of life left to live without his guidance.
You are brothers with a common bond of me as your father and you share the commonality that you each have a mother devoted to making your lives the best they can be.
Opa always had a way to inspire people with his words and some day, you may be able to look back on this blog and find it full of insights I left here for each of you.
Being the father to a son with autism and a son without autism, I never know how these words will be interpreted but perhaps you can both find something of value here.
Coming off the heels of Father’s Day, I wanted to share a handful of lessons and wishes for both of you.
-Be Good Men: I will never ask you to be perfect because I was never perfect and it won’t be a standard I hold for you. I’ll ask you to be kind and fair. I’ll ask you to never fear love and to never hold grudges. I’ll ask you to always seek ways to improve who you are. That journey never ends. I’ll ask you to be considerate, compassionate and holding open, safe space to those who confide in you.
-Be Honest Men: If there is one thing that can tear down a household, ruin a relationship and damage the way you view yourself, it is dishonesty. I’ve seen it first hand and while sometimes dishonesty can seem convenient or a way to spare pain to others, it rarely ends in the places you want it to. Be honest, be true, and, perhaps most importantly, apologize with sincerity if you hurt someone through dishonesty.
-Be Loving Men: They say that the first love you ever know is the love of your mother, and in the case of each of you, I’d say that first love is right. Knowing each of your respective mothers, you have been showered with a love like no other. Who you are today is a direct reflection of the love those mothers have given you. That’s in no way meant to discredit my love for you. As a result, I ask that when you fall in love, that you do it fully and without keeping score. That doesn’t mean you’ll never be hurt. You likely will have your heart broken more than once, but it will teach you valuable lessons. When you find the person who loves you the way you love them in return, it’s not that it will be a perfect love without friction, rather it will be the kind of love worth fighting for. Stay true to that love.
-Be Hard Working Men: You will not love every job that you do but put your best effort into the work you do. You’ll find people who are easy to work for because they know how to guide you and give you room to grow. You may also find people who are difficult to work for and those people can show you the type of person not to be. Some of my most lasting and enduring lessons in work came from people who were the most difficult to work with and for. It taught me how to be different than them. If you’re fortunate, you’ll find a career that you love but what you may find instead is a career that you’re good at which provides you a life that you love.
-Find Men To Look Up To: Let me say this first, you’ll learn a lot about being a better man through the women in your life. But aside from that influence, find men who you can look up to. Not every man who can positively influence you will be your elder. Some will be your age, some will be younger. Look for attributes you don’t already have. Absorb what you can about the way they work, the way they handle personal challenges, the way they are as fathers to their own children, the way they treat their significant others and the way they respect you for being in their life. You can learn more from your personal relationships than any book can teach you (but you need the books too).
Lastly (for now), continue to love one another. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: you two are the greatest gifts I’ve given to this world. Take care of one another. Dad loves you.
To provide some backstory on this post, I was recently reading a book that was a small collection of transcripts from a podcast.
In this book, the hosts are making some small talk and the one host mentions that he’s eating grapes.
His co-host says that compared to something like Cheerios, grapes are a good option.
And it got me thinking: I wonder what my clients would say about that?
So, I asked the majority of the clients that we saw on one day of business this question: What’s worse for your health: A serving of Cheerios or a serving of grapes?
I’ll give you the results first.
Of 24 people asked, 13 said that Cheerios were worse and 11 said grapes were the worst.
What’s the truth?
Well, part of that depends on your perspective.
Here’s a breakdown of each (1.5 cups is the serving size):
If fat loss were your goal, the 26 calorie difference between the two is basically a non-issue.
The difference is carbohydrates is somewhat significant and the grapes have considerably higher sugar content (that might matter if you’re a diabetic).
Most (not all) people would prefer to eat their Cheerios with milk or a dairy alternative and this would raise the calories (and macronutrients accordingly) for the serving.
We often hear people say that you should a) eat more fruits and vegetables and b) eat mostly whole, minimally processed food. Neither of these suggestions is inherently incorrect.
But what I found, in getting my clients to choose between the two is that some people hesitated in their response or would second-guess their choice. Some people think that cereal (in general) isn’t a healthy choice and others look down on grapes for the sugar content.
The reality is, neither of these options is particularly unhealthy and what you choose to include in your diet leans into personal preference and enjoyment of a food, your ability to moderate the portions you need as it pertains to your goals, and how that food may affect your performance and/or your digestive system.
If you’ve been following my work for awhile, you know what side of the fence I sit on: Don’t demonize foods. Unless you’re allergic or intolerant to something, there’s no need to keep something out of your diet. There may be foods you don’t enjoy, foods you don’t moderate well and foods which may not be helpful to keep around the house if you’re trying to succeed at something like fat loss.
I also decided to pose the Cheerios vs grapes question on Instagram over the weekend and an interesting comment came up: “This is the stuff that gives us parents so much anxiety…saying that grapes are worse than Cheerios. What are we left to feed our children?”
And I love this question. It leans right into one of my biggest problems about the information we receive on social media about our food: too many people spend their time creating content that makes viewers fear their food choices.
The unfortunate thing about that is there are far too many logical and intelligent people out there who are getting misled by poor information.
I’ll address this directly to Julie, who commented on my post: Rest assured that you can feed your child Cheerios or grapes and feel like you’re making an appropriate decision. There’s enough parent shaming and parent guilt out there about the decisions we make for our children. I’m not going to add to the mixwith fear-mongering comments.
And the same sentiment goes out to the rest of you too: enjoy your Cheerios and enjoy your grapes.
If you’re struggling to make sense of all this nutrition stuff, I’ll be opening up the doors to the next intake of Fat Loss Simplified, my 8-week online group coaching program at the beginning of July. If you’d like to be on the waiting list, drop a comment below.
A few weeks ago, I was at home, sick in bed and trying to recuperate.
If you follow me on Instagram, you may know that I make a post on there every day. That’s little more than a marketing tactic.
However, on this particular day, since I wasn’t feeling so hot, I thought: Maybe I just won’t post anything today. I’m not feeling it and I’m sure no one will notice.
But I have some software on my phone that lets me take video templates and repurpose them for social media and I had been seeing some decent feedback from those.
So, at a time of day when I don’t normally post on social media, I found a video I could use, spent about 2-3 minutes tweaking it for my purposes and posted it up.
And, by all comparisons, especially in my little bubble, it went viral.
As of this writing (and it’s still going), this 5 second video has been seen over 950,000 times, it’s been liked by over 22,000 people, it’s been shared over 18,000 times and I have apparently gained over 100 new followers from it.
I’ve not paid to boost the post and there is no special hashtag or caption connected to it that would/should have made it more popular than anything else that I’ve done.
But, if we trust what the social media gurus tell us, it’s a message that resonates and, it contains a clip from a movie that a lot of people love.
Let’s break it down:
I snatched a clip from the movie The Devil Wears Prada (which I’ve only seen once) and it features Meryl Streep saying the line: “By all means move at a glacial pace, you know how that thrills me”.
When I saw the clip, it made me think of how people feel about how fast/slow the scale moves when they’re trying to lose fat.
I thought: I could totally work with this clip.
So, in the text above Meryl’s image, I posted this: When you kicked ass in all of your workouts, adhered to your food plan, got enough protein in, kept your step count up, and the scale dropped 0.2 lbs.
And apparently, a lot of people knew this feeling intimately well and it blew up.
While the numbers are indeed something I’ve been excited about seeing, I actually wanted to break down the context of that post so that you’ve got some practical takeaways from it.
Fat loss is one of those strange areas of life where the effort you put in doesn’t always equate to the results you get in return. There are ways that the body can compensate for a lack of energy coming in and there is enough user error when it comes to estimating how much we eat and, as a result, a lot of areas are left open to interpretation.
I’m going to go line by line and try to clear this up:
“When you kicked ass in all of your workouts…”: Coming from a guy who owns a gym, I am #teamexercise all the way. I want you to be the strongest, fittest version of yourself that you can be. That being said, exercise, despite how some people look at it, is not the most efficient way to achieve fat loss. For one, the average person (who isn’t being studied in a lab) has no accurate way of determining how many calories they burn in a 30-60 minute workout, for instance. Your smartwatch may tell you one thing, but it’s wrong. Your cardio equipment of choice may tell you something else, but it’s also wrong. On the flipside, many people assume that because they’re sweating a lot or that their heart rate stayed elevated that they burned a boatload of calories. The fact is, maybe they did and maybe they didn’t. And it’s not just what you do in that exercise session, it’s how much you expend over a 24 hour period. Suffice to say, if you have a really ass-kicking workout, there’s a good chance that you’re going to be tired afterwards and if you’re tired, guess what you’re not going to be doing? Moving around very much. That extra movement in a day is called NEAT (non-exercise activity thermogenesis) and it actually contributes to a considerable amount of your expenditure in a day. So, as a coach, I do want you to show up for your workouts, and I do want you to move as much as possible, but I don’t want you to overestimate how much you’re burning because we just don’t have a good way to estimate that.
“…adhered to your food plan…”: By comparison, the most efficient mover of the scale is the measure of what you’re putting/not putting into your mouth. As we in the fat loss realm like to say: adherence is everything. So, the best diet plan is the one you can stick with most consistently and that’s not just the choice of foods but the appropriate deficit for your lifestyle. Depending on how conservative or aggressive you are with the deficit you create, this reflects in what the scale will show you. A lot of things can affect the scale though. Wild fluctuations in carbohydrate consumption, sodium intake and hydration all play a role. Stress can also affect how you retain fluids. Also, you may not be removing waste efficiently from your digestive system. Any of these factors can change what the scale says and while the scale is a helpful measuring tool, it’s not without nuance.
“…got enough protein in…”: Often, when people hear that they need to increase their protein intake, they do so without dropping the amount of carbohydrates or fats they’re consuming. As result, even though the increase in protein is generally a good thing, it may also take someone into an energy surplus for the day and (wait for it), they go UP in weight. So, while I absolutely want you to take advantage of all that strength training you’re doing and fueling yourself with the appropriate amount of protein, if fat loss is your goal, you’ll have to drop some amount of carbohydrates and fats to make up the difference and still keep you in an energy deficit.
“…kept your step count up…”: While I would never want to steer someone away from the neurological and physical benefits of traditional cardiovascular exercise, one of the best ways to burn a few extra calories with the least risk of injury and the lowest barrier to entry, it’s walking. Now, you don’t have to aim for 10k steps a day (unless of course it’s an easy number for you to hit), but you can see plenty of benefit from establishing a baseline of steps you currently get and aiming to increase that number as consistently as you can. Another added benefit is that walking is a lot less likely to increase your hunger which is an important factor to consider when you’re trying to lose fat and stay adherent to your plan.
“…the scale dropped 0.2 lbs”: Herein lies the rub. You can be doing alltherightthings and the scale will barely budge (or it may even go up). The problem that a lot of folks forget is that, even when you’re checking everything off the list, the scale won’t always reflect the number. The best tip is to look at the data point over a period of weeks and see if the number is trending down. If the number remains flat, then your intake is roughly in line with what you’re expending in a day. Sometimes, people do hold steady in a weight plateau for a period of weeks and playing the waiting game is the best they can do. In other words, don’t change anything. Keep following the plan you’re on and see if other areas of the body are changing. Many people report that when the scale isn’t moving down, their body is actually shifting in composition. Maybe they notice that they’re using an extra belt loop or their pants feel looser. Keep in mind, that to lose one pound of fat, you’re trying to drop approximately 3500 calories. It’s not perfect math and it’s not a perfect process. If you truly feel stuck, try making a slight drop in intake or by trying to make a slight increase in what you’re burning. Make that effort consistent and see what changes.
Of course, it’s not always easy to spot where we’re getting stuck and that’s where having a coach alongside you can help. If you need guidance, drop me a line.
As for the original viral post, it’s wild to see how well it performed but it says a lot about a common frustration for so many people struggling to get that damn scale to play along nicely with our goals.
Over the last several years, I’ve made a few posts about my therapist, Collin.
He has been of immeasurable help to me at times when I was in need.
Last week, I found out that his heart no longer has the strength it needs to keep him with us beyond a year. In his words, he said he has about 6-12 months left.
In our conversation, he said that he would continue to see clients as his health allows and I asked if he could slot me in for some time.
I’m fortunate that, as of late, I’ve not felt “in need” of therapy as I have in the past but, at this point, me meeting with him is less about what he can do for me, and more about how I can repay his kindness and guidance before he leaves this world.
I hope you don’t mind that I take a few detours with the blog to leave you with some of his wisdom during the remainder of his time left.
Collin has been instrumental at reminding me what happens when you leave childhood trauma unchecked and unhealed. He gave me books to read and homework to do on my own time to help me understand what happens when we don’t heal our wounds. Speaking only for myself, trauma that isn’t processed hurts people who should never be targets.
Throughout our time together when he and I were meeting more routinely, it wasn’t uncommon for me to spend most of our hour together going on and on about what was happening in life, good and bad, and him listening patiently as I spoke.
He would ask a few questions along the way, gaining more insight, but more often than not, Collin would find a way to sneak in a question or a statement that would stop me dead in my tracks. I would often tell people: that one “thing” would make the cost of the session worth every penny.
Collin would rarely give me advice, rather he would shine a light on my thought process, offer a perspective, and allow me to marinate on the rest.
A sentiment he shared with me early in our time together, which I reflected on several years ago was this: when you’re in enough pain, you’ll change.
The context for his comment is of less importance than the lesson itself. Often, we stay stuck in certain patterns because we fear change or we’ve convinced ourselves that where we are, despite the discomfort, is the path of least resistance. Only when we’ve determined that the pain we’re in can no longer be tolerated do we find the resolve to change.
So profound was that sentiment that it inspired an article of its own on this site about four years ago.
When I was looking for a therapist in 2019, I knew I wanted a man, not because I wasn’t comfortable with a female therapist, quite the contrary. I wanted a male therapist because I needed a paternal voice after losing my father in 2011. Collin became that voice.
It stands to reason that the thought of losing him brings back memories of losing my Dad.
I’m not ready to lose Collin. And I am certain that he has other clients who are in the same boat as me: unwilling to say goodbye and trying to make the best of the time that’s left.
If you currently see a therapist, especially an effective one, you know how valuable they can be.
If you’re not seeing one and you feel stuck in certain parts of your life, I will always advocate for that search. It’s worth it.
I know that I will have to be on the lookout for another therapist again, but in the meantime, I hope to give something of the “gift” back to the man who helped me find my footing.
(Pictured below, a photo of Collin and I from 2023.)
There’s hardly a week that goes by that I don’t talk about protein requirements with a client and I’m not sure that I’ve gone in to much detail about it on the site before.
Before we get into the quantity, let’s cover a few areas of importance for those who may need the refresher:
-Most people consume some combination of three primary macronutrients: protein, carbohydrates and fats. Alcohol counts as a macronutrient as well but I won’t cover anything about alcohol in this post.
-Protein assists with muscle recovery and repair (which is important if you’re doing any manner of strength/resistance training). It is arguably the most satiating macronutrient to consume which is why it helps to keep the number higher when you’re in a fat loss phase. Protein intake also helps with immune support and contributes to healthy hair and skin.
-Unless you have a diagnosed concern with your kidneys, a high(er) protein diet should not have any negative side effects.
-By and large, even with the information provided below, protein doesn’t need to be more than 30-40% of your daily intake.
So, let’s get into the numbers. The RDA recommended amount is 0.8/g per kg of bodyweight. That means that a 200lb (91kg) person only needs 73g of protein per day. However, this number is widely disputed, especially in the fitness community because the RDA amount basically makes sure that you’re not deficient in the nutrient NOT that it’s been maximized for performance, strength or fat loss.
What I find, in practice, is somewhere closer to 1.2-1.6g per kg of bodyweight. Taking our same 200 lb individual, that’s approximately 109-146g of protein per day.
Of note, the numbers don’t need to be perfect. If you find that you’re really struggling to hit the lower number but you’re getting somewhere to the tune of 100g per day, that’s perfectly fine. You don’t need to agonize over every solitary gram.
If I had to work off of a given trend, most women who come to see me for fat loss average 50-60g of protein per day. I do what I can to get most of my female clients closer to 100g right out of the gate.
What many women find is that, while it can be a challenge to push the protein up initially, once they get in the groove with it, it’s less of an issue.
On the flipside of the numbers, there’s nothing wrong with overshooting the upper end either. Some people (myself included) feel better with a high(er) protein intake.
If you’re in the elderly population, bear in mind that your body may not metabolize protein as efficiently as when you were younger so in addition to keeping your protein intake high enough, you may also need to pick one meal each day with a significantly higher serving of protein by comparison. For example, if you were shooting for 100g of protein per day, rather than aiming for 4 servings of 25 grams, try 2 servings of 25 grams and 1 serving of 50 grams.
So what about the sources? There are many options available that can provide protein to the body, the biggest obstacles being: A) what do you enjoy B) what is the best bang for the buck?
Generally, you want to aim for leaner sources of protein where possible and that may include skinless chicken, skinless turkey, certain cuts of beef, most seafood, yogurt, and certain protein shakes/powders (not a comprehensive list).
Fattier sources of protein could include many cuts of beef, bacon, sausage, hot dogs, cheese, salmon, nuts, chicken/turkey with the skin on and prime rib (also not a comprehensive list).
You can find protein in many grains, legumes, vegetables and soy. However, with plant based options, you’re not just getting the protein itself but some carbs and fat as well. Vegetarians and vegans tend to struggle a bit more with getting the higher amounts of protein and still keeping the sources lean which is where protein powders/shakes can be helpful. Current research as shown that as long as protein/calorie intake is matched, plant-based protein can be just as effective as animal-based protein for strength and fat loss.
For those who have gotten into the world of macro tracking for fat loss, allow me to simplify the process for you. Make sure your calories are in line with your goals, set a protein range, and then let carbs and fats fall where they need to. You don’t need to lose your mind over every gram of every macronutrient to be successful.
One other point of consideration is how each source may affect your hunger. Protein shakes/powders, while convenient and practical, may not be very satisfying when it comes to improving feelings of satiety. Where possible, aim for whole food sources which actually require you to chew your calories as opposed to just drinking them, and this should help.
Feeling confused and don’t know where to start? Drop me a line and let’s see if we can get your food plan heading the right direction.
Throughout all the years of my (and his) life, I never heard my father speak an unkind word about or toward his mother, my Oma.
This sentiment applies as well to my mother. Not once have I ever heard her speak an unkind word about or toward my grandmother.
In saying this, it’s not that there were never disagreements, there were.
But the response was always thoughtful and respectful.
I would love to tell you I absorbed all of that when it came to my own mother, but that’s not entirely true. I did have times when I was unkind and didn’t act with the respect I should have.
I grew out of that.
Watching my mother as she became a grandmother was also inspiring.
The last seven years (if we include time during pregnancy) of Marissa’s life have been where I think she has changed the most, as a mother herself.
We do our best to raise Sebastian in ways that when he thinks of or speaks to his mother, it’s with respect. (It’s a work in progress, I’m sure you understand).
The day before Mother’s Day, Sebastian asked Marissa if he would be receiving any gifts for the holiday.
I said: Sebastian, the woman in front of you is your gift. The best gift.
I look around me and I am surrounded by strong, capable, inspiring women: my wife, my mother, my grandmother, my mother-in-law, and all of the mothers who come to train at RevFit (online and face-to-face).
I remember my Oma fondly as she embodied these characteristics as well.
I pay tribute to my Aunt Virginia, who passed away peacefully just last week, only days before Mother’s Day. My sincerest condolences go to my Uncle Brian and my cousins Mary and Joey not just for the loss but because of how close it falls to this holiday. If there’s one thing I knew about my aunt, she dearly loved her family.
I’ll leave you with this:
If you’re a mom, I hope that Mother’s Day was a special day for you.
If you have a great mother, I hope you had a way to celebrate the holiday with her.
If your mother is no longer with us, I hope you did something beautiful and loving in remembrance of her.
If your mother was not the person who you hoped she would be, I hope that it serves as inspiration for you to do and be better.
Whether you are a mother to one or several, or you have fur babies who can call you their own, I hope the day was a great day for you.
As for me, it’s an endless show of respect for the women who make my life what it is today.
Jason Leenaarts 